Demonic Chaote

Ancestral veneration and worship is a big part of many religions as well as most pagan traditions, and it’s easy to understand why. Our ancestors are the reason we’re all here at all. Without our ancestors, we wouldn’t exist. For me though, there’s always been that lingering question – what if my ancestors were bad people? There’s an easy answer for that: simply don’t venerate those ancestors. But what if like, a big chunk of them were really bad people? Like, most of the ones you know about?

I am a white American. My ancestors were slaveholders. And I’m not just saying that because I’m a white American and that’s what I presume. When I was doing research into my ancestry a while back I found records for a lot of them. Names of plantations, records of how many slaves they owned, etc.. Meanwhile on the other side of my family I found records of family members who actively participated in the atrocities committed against indigenous peoples in Canada. The majority of the ancestors I know about were not people who deserve veneration. Even those ancestors closer to me – grandparents, great grandparents, and so forth – were bad people. In fact, all but one great-grandmother was an abusive alcoholic. Again, not particularly a group of people I want to honor.

Okay, I can hear some of you say, then just don’t incorporate ancestor work into your practice? And that would definitely be the easiest answer. In fact I often don’t. However, I am still immensely grateful for my life and the main path I follow outside of demonolatry is Fyrnsidu, an Anglo-Saxon variant of Heathenry. For those who know anything about Heathenry you’ll know that ancestral veneration is an extremely important part of that path. So I’ve done a lot of reading into how other people with awful ancestors work with those who came before, and have come up with some of my own as well.

My being Heathen in and of itself is an act of general ancestral veneration. I have mainly English and French heritage, and so getting into Fyrnsidu as a recreation of the religion my ancestors might have followed is one of the ways I pay homage to them. I obviously don’t have records of who these ancestors were or what kind of people they were, but I know they existed. Maybe they were terrible, but I have no idea. I personally feel much better engaging in devotional acts such as these to long-forgotten ancestors than I do giving offerings to the fuckheads who owned “Happy Oak Plantation.”.

I remember having a full panic attack one day because I was so disgusted by my heritage (rightfully so) and I was worried that any form of ancestral veneration would allow them to siphon off energy for themselves somehow (did I mention I have OCD?). In a meditation later that day I was confronted by a spirit I’d never met before. She told me her name, and told me that she would be my ancestor from that time. I of course, doubted that I didn’t just make something up out of guilt so I googled the name the spirit gave me which I’d never heard before. Sure enough, the name she gave me was of a real person who looked exactly like the spirit I saw, and she was an abolitionist who operated schools for black children. So those of us who have awful ancestors may do well meditating on them. Perhaps you may also make contact with a spirit whose values match yours and who takes you in as their descendant.

When I do actively pay homage to my ancestors there are two types of ancestors I honor, and I’m very specific about only honoring these ancestors. I’ve actively told my shitty ancestors that I do not acknowledge them and that these acts are not for them. I often like to make funny, jokey titles for my posts but this one is mostly serious. I did in fact, straight up disown my own ancestors. It’s been very liberating and I encourage anyone who is put off by their forebears heinous actions to do the same if you feel so called.

The first type of ancestors I do venerate is ancestors in spirit. One example of what I mean by this is that I honor the transgender activists who came before me and paved the way with their bravery and tenacity. I may or may not be actually related to any of them, but I consider them ancestors of mine in spirit, in community. Another example of this is my autistic ancestors, disability activists, and changelings (because I have fully bought into the theory that changelings were just autistic kids, and as such have identified with them heavily since I was a teenager.). It doesn’t just have to be groups you are a part of though – some people honor early hominids as their ancestors, or even prehistoric animals. All of these I would consider “ancestors in spirit”.

The other type of ancestor I do pay homage to is specific members of my family, whether they are actually “ancestors” or not. One example of this is an aunt of mine who passed away around four years ago. I regularly light candles and pray to her. She might not be my literal ancestor, but she serves the same function in my life and practice. Another specific person I pay homage to is the abolitionist spirit mentioned above, as well as a farmhand named Christopher who comforted me after I lost my dog because he too had a great love for dogs. I once saw someone who made regular offerings to the mitochondrial Eve as an ancestor of theirs which I found absolutely fascinating and thought it was an excellent idea. So if you choose to venerate specific ancestors, they don’t have to be closely related to you, or even really related at all.

In the end though, you don’t have to work with or honor any of your ancestors at all. There’s no rule saying it’s necessary, no matter what anyone might say. The Chaos Magician in me says that you should simply do what works, and if that doesn’t work for you, get rid of it.

And of course, as always, I hope someone else out there found this to be helpful in some way. Feel free to leave a comment if you have other thoughts, want to continue the conversation, or disagree with me completely. Or don’t, it’s up to you. Either way, I hope you have a good one!

– J